Ralph
was so excited to go on a Train ride with his best friend Jordan. They went up
to the conductor and gave their golden tickets to him, found their seats and plop down on it. The Train
started to move at a slow pace but then started to accelerate. As the train
entered the tunnel Ralph and Jordan giggled
because it was gloomy for a long time, then the bright sun rise hurt their
eyes. Then they went into a tunnel again! But this time there was a humongous beast
with large eyes as red as lava, with fire breathing breathe coming out of its
mouth. Every one ran away from it including Ralph and Jordan.
By Karl
I love it when you said it was gloomy. Thats a awesome word. From Tom
ReplyDeleteThis is a suspenseful piece of writing, Karl. You have lured your readers into thinking this will be a fun train adventure for the two friends, but then you surprise us with the second tunnel. Good job creating suspense at the end. I wonder what happened to Ralph and Jordan? Keeping your readers wondering and using their imagination is a good technique.
ReplyDeleteGood job.
Barbara (Team 100WC)
The Phoenix School, Salem, MA USA